Asking For Your Help

A moment to pause

During the pandemic, our family was into the show Shark Tank. As businesses struggled and the world wondered what would become of us, the show gave me hope that new ideas and companies would emerge when the lockdown ended. As a family, we debated which ideas were innovative and where we would invest if we had the Sharks’ money. 

The prevailing lesson for entrepreneurs who secure a deal is, “Never give up on your dream. Don’t quit—keep going.” It’s a message I appreciate. I sign every one of my books with “Keep Pedaling.” The ability to persevere, along with one of my favorite quotes—”When the going gets tough, the tough get going”—fueled my recovery, corporate career, and even my bike ride across America. It keeps me fighting for greater equity, inclusion, and a less violent world. As they say, “Winners never quit.”

But do they? Is this true for everything? 

Maybe winners know what to quit when. 

At this point, I want to let you know this will be a longer Ripple Effect share than usual. If you want to tap out now, there’s no judgment; I understand and still love you. 

My current coaching practice began as a calling I heard in 2001 while in the I.C.U. I spent the next thirteen years advancing my career and studying leadership, culture, and mindset in preparation. Today, it’s a vibrant, boutique coaching and speaking practice for leaders who care enough to make a difference. 

Like most coaches, I’m a freelancer, not an entrepreneur. Neither is better, but knowing which camp you’re in is essential because they differ in scale, asset and value creation, growth model, risk tolerance, and exit strategy.

If you’re still with me, thank you. Let’s keep pedaling. 

As you might know, my Pause Breathe Reflect Mindfulness Method was born at The Kessler Institute for Rehabilitation in West Orange, New Jersey—the same place that treated my Superman, Christopher Reeve. I was scared and overwhelmed by the enormity and uncertainty of my future—feelings many have today.

It started with a simple box breathing practice to help my mind slow down, create space, and be intentional about how I wanted to show up for rehab so I could return home. I knew enough about mindfulness and meditation in 2001 to judge it as something soft, but I was desperate and willing to try anything. 

And it started to work! 

As I came home to familiar sights and smells and slowly returned to work, I continued my practice and studies about its foundational underpinnings on my way to becoming a qualified teacher. 

At work, my micro-practices were like reactive mind circuit-breakers, helping me approach work differently than my colleagues. Of course, I still had my moments—but overall, things became more graceful. 

However, as the head of sales and marketing, there was no way I was going to get up in front of a thousand sales and marketing folks during the early 2000s and 2010s and invite them to connect with their breath. Even though my practice enhanced my focus, opened my awareness, and helped me adapt to change better, I thought people would judge or shun me. As someone back then with a massive rock of wanting to be wanted in his backpack, that was too risky. So, I kept my practice to myself.

Let me fast-forward a bit. I promise this is going somewhere. 

In late 2019, I started to share that I had a dream that eight billion people would take at least one minute every day to Pause, Breathe, and Reflect, and as a result, we would live in a more peaceful and kinder world. I still have this dream, but today, I would be okay if 800 million did so as a start. 😀

Then the pandemic hit. 

I thought the grand barista in the sky (aka, whoever fills your M.U.G.—Mother Earth, The Universe, or God) was trying to tell us, “Hey humans, we need you to slow down. So the three of us hit the pause button so you can take a breath and reflect on how you wish to treat yourself, others, and the only planet you’ve got.” 

And for a moment, it was working. Yes, we were scared and suffered significant losses, but we started to hear, see, and appreciate each other better. Remember our focus on essential workers?

Between Zooms with my clients and episodes of Shark Tank, I thought, “If not now, then when would I have the courage to share my method openly?” Knowing how it changed my life when I was at my lowest point, it would be selfish not to share it now, so I began to lead live practices to provide folks with space to process what we were living through. 

I wasn’t trying to reach those who went to Spirit Rock for a week-long silent retreat or folks who bought into MindValley or what Gwyneth was pitching. I wanted to speak with those in the middle – which is 95% of us – who weren’t quite sure about this breathing stuff, tried it once, or only did it when things were rough. I wanted to demystify mindfulness. 

That summer, I decided to ride my bike inside for 19 straight hours for 19 charities providing COVID-19 relief and support. It was also the 19th anniversary of my Last Bad Day, so I created the first Pause Breathe Reflect (P.B.R.) t-shirt and sold way more than 19. Yay! 

I wonder? Could this lead to a Shark Tank moment? 

I don’t gamble, and I’ve never played the lottery, but I did allow myself to dream that (P.B.R.) could be the next Life is Good® because instead of making a statement, Pause Breathe Reflect reminded the wearer and invited everyone who saw it to create some space and act thoughtfully. 

I set out to create a remarkable t-shirt that could help us through the pandemic and would make Mother Earth proud. I wasn’t going to buy some cheap shirt made in China and ship it in a white plastic bag. Ours would be carbon neutral, use natural dyes, be size-inclusive, buttery soft, shipped in recycled packaging, and manufactured in the U.S.A. in a worker-supported way. We checked every box.

It was a hit! The shirts received rave reviews, and people loved the special message inside each tee. Someone told me that putting it on “felt like a big hug.” But I had no clue about what I was doing.

No worries, I thought. So many Shark Tank stories, like Scrub Daddy, were about founders starting and finding their way forward in their basement or garage. 

But my excitement got the best of me. I soon discovered that inventory management isn’t one of my superpowers, and the word-of-mouth ripple I had hoped for never developed. 

While going through painful Swag School 101 and as the pandemic continued, I ramped up the number of free live practices I was hosting through the new social app called Clubhouse. Four times a day, people worldwide came together to Pause, Breathe, Reflect, and share what was on their minds and touching their hearts. 

It was therapeutic and changed lives—in fact, it saved lives, based on the letters I received. Our practice even helped people find the strength to beat their addictions and maladaptive ways of handling pandemic stress with a practice that was nourishing.

Unfortunately, as Clubhouse grew, so did the toxicity and creepiness on its platform. It got me thinking: Why are we in a clubhouse? Let’s build our own home that is safe, brave, and welcomes everyone regardless of where they live, their income, the color of their skin, or who they love, pray to, or vote for.

I wanted to create a community that was big enough to support itself and contribute to non-political causes to make the world better. It would be remarkable and different than the big-name apps—it would focus on shorter practices to help people realize they could make it a way of life. Folks who downloaded the app would be considered members of our community, not users, and we wouldn’t seek VC money or ask our members a bunch of questions to “size them up” and then sell their data as a revenue strategy. 

The practice would be relatable, practical, and something you could do anywhere and everywhere. We would also host live practices to encourage belonging, which we thirst for today.

I listened when people said I needed to shorten the name or hook people within two seconds on “the socials” because people have short attention spans or ​make it like what was currently out there, or just introduce a cheap app.​

But, ultimately, I said, “No, thank you,” and asked for the check. 

To just call it pause misses the value of your breath. The breath creates space to reflect on how you want to show up for life. It’s about taking thoughtful action. Your action creates ripples. Your ripples create outcomes. Okay, the mini-rant is over. 

The app wasn’t perfect when we launched—nothing ever is—but even though we struggled when people compared our beginning to another app’s maturity, we kept improving it with every update and earned a 4.9 rating on Apple’s App Store. We were starting to make our mark, and Apple and Google took 30% of every dollar. 

To continue supporting people as we entered our post-pandemic world, I was encouraged to bring back The Kintsugi Podcast. Kintsugi is an essential metaphor for our fractured world and the divided country I call home. I thought sharing inspirational stories of resilience and connection was a great idea to help us stay hopeful, and it climbed to the top 3% of podcasts worldwide. 

On the surface, things look wonderful, considering I decided to enter three noisy markets: Merch, Apps, and Podcasts. I’m proud that we’ve created offerings that are remarkable and have made a difference. I frequently receive messages telling me that it seems like I’m “crushing it!”

Yes, as a freelancer in many ways, but not as an entrepreneur. 

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For clarity, I can stand in front of my bathroom mirror, naked, and give myself a high-five for the ripples I’ve created, starting with raising two amazing humans with my wife – there is so much to be grateful for. 

And I will support and encourage people to P.B.R. until my very last day, and I love bringing my approach to companies like I will next month with JP Morgan. 

My aim has always been to offer services and offerings with a soul. I don’t do cheap. I don’t race to the bottom. Life is not a transaction; it should be, transforming. 

I come to the end of the year in a tug-of-war on how I offer Pause Breathe Reflect to the world. 

Is it through merch? 

Is it through the podcast? 

Is it through the app or in a different way?

Should I keep pedaling as the going gets tough, or is this a moment to quit the right thing at the right time?

Every founder who appears on Shark Tank gets these two questions: 1) What is your go-to-market strategy? 2) Tell us about your numbers. 

Well, my entrepreneurial numbers, in a word, stink. I’ve spent a small fortune bootstrapping our app, merch, and podcast. I’m so fortunate to have a P.B.R. partner in Josh Eidenberg, who has given so much of his time, energy, and ideas at no cost, but it saddles me with guilt. Some will say I lost money, but I don’t regret a dime. 

It’s made a difference, and our upcoming app update is insane in the best possible way. It will help people find more time, energy, and focus. We are entering a 90-day period that will give us the boost we need or not to make P.B.R. sustainable. 

Okay, we are reaching the end. Thanks for reading this far. 

Here’s where I could use your support. 

I’m sure you follow folks who appear on Instagram, LinkedIn, or TikTok to be “crushing it.” They got the fancy website, books, and certifications out the wazoo. They might feel like the need to appear to be “all that and a bag of chips” online, but behind the scenes, it’s challenging. 

If you know them, reach out. Ask them how it’s going for “reals.” If they’re struggling, you don’t need to fix it- just listen. If you don’t know them, consider how you consume their content and whether you see and hear the person behind the content – of course, AI is making this more challenging today, but I’m sure you get the idea. 

Oh, if you couldn’t tell, AI didn’t write any of this. 😀

During my recovery, I discovered the importance of asking for help. It’s not a sign of weakness but a declaration that you’re not giving up – which I won’t do until I run out of budget. It’s also best not to wait too long to ask – we guys are not great at this. 

So, here is my ask: please let me know if you have specific contacts that could help us…

• Support companies that wish to support their employees’ health and sharpen their focus, attention, and agility to change. 
• Leverage PR and current events (i.e., 2025 Best Apps lists)
• Partner with other organizations to help people improve their digital and overall health and get out into nature. 

Of course, I will take any good vibes. We love good vibes. 🙌🙌🙌

Thanks for reading. I appreciate you and still believe this moment we share calls us to Pause Breathe Reflect. 

Until next week, have fun storming the castle!

Michael

P.S. I plan to stop my Kintsugi Podcast or turn it into a 15-minute-per-week show to help us navigate 2025 – if you have thoughts, LMK.