Is it time to let go of your raft?

There’s a story about a traveler who comes to a massive body of water that she can’t cross easily. So, she decides to build a raft to get to the other side. She was successful. After all, she can do hard things – as we all can – three cheers for our traveler, but she has a decision to make before continuing her journey.

What does she do with the raft?

When we start out, we follow the advice of those who came before us. They tell us, “This is what I did, and you can have a successful journey if you follow my way” There’s wisdom here, but often we forget to reflect on what does it mean to be successful?

They tell us to hustle and grind, and unveil only what they want us to see. The willingness to work hard is a prerequisite to every journey, but there can be an unhealthy line that we rationalize away as we cross it.

On the other side, we feel stressed, but instead of letting it go, we deny or numb it away, and since there doesn’t seem to be any separation between personal and work, we begin to believe that what we do is who we are.

All these snakes and stones become our raft.

And we carried it around because that’s what everyone does.

But you hold your raft differently, and people begin to notice. You get recognized and win a 40 under 40 award for best raft carrier. You get asked to speak, and people want to know your secret, so you tell them how important it is to hustle and grind and never let go of your raft.

You climb the corporate ladder, get a better salary with a bigger office, and justify all the hours cranking out emails and attending meetings because you’re ________________________. Plus, your ego digs it.

But privately, you want to stop carrying such a heavy load some days.

But the idea of letting go of the raft is too risky.

You believe it’s keeping you afloat even when it’s sinking you.

You made it to the mid-point in your career. Congratulations!

But what got you here ain’t going to get you there.

Here’s a not-so-fun fact: “Making it happen” from your mid-twenties to mid-forties is less stressful than trying to hold on to your raft for “dear life” as you head toward your mid-sixties.

And sure, you can read about “how to let go” in a book or hear about ways other people have done it on a podcast, or find examples in your feed, but ultimately, you need to find your way. Which may be 98% of things you’ve heard, but your secret sauce is in your 2%.

Here’s why it’s essential to start traveling differently.

Something happens somewhere between 40 and 50. For one, our bodies begin to have a mind of their own, and those six tacos and three beers you had last night at 39 turns into five pounds overnight when you’re 45. We go to sleep feeling fine but wake up with a pulled muscle and begin to worry about caring for our parents as we think about how in the world are we going to pay for college. The stress builds, so we get a prescription or two or three, but those don’t cure what ails us; they only mask the disease.

That IOU we wrote to hustle and grind in our 20s and 30s comes collecting in our 40s and 50s, and how we work and live during these two decades will determine how we live in our 60s and beyond.

What got us here ain’t going to get us there.

So, what does your “there” look like?

And we’ll start with one step or a question.

What will it take for you to let go of your raft?

The traveler in the parable lets go of her raft. It was essential for one part of her journey, but she realized that it was too much to carry. She’s grateful for it, but where she’s heading requires a different way.

The same is true for you if you want to get “there.”

Until next week, have fun storming the castle!

Michael